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The Idiotic Half Birthday Phenomenon

Today Bossy Girl made the comment that Sunday will be her "half birthday."
HUH?
Half birthday?
WTF?
This isn't the first time I've heard of this and the fact that people actually celebrate it.  Bossy Girl was invited to a half birthday party last summer, and I'm sorts of confused about the purpose behind it. We did NOT go, by the way.

I don't freaking get this half birthday trend plain and simple.  You may disagree and think it's all wonderful and creative and you're all, hey, we do it in my family!  Oh well.  I think it's moronic.

I will never hold a "half birthday" party for my kids, but I know she'll be invited to more in her lifetime. Do I let her go when I'm so morally against it?
And more importantly, can I get the kid a half present? Like for half off?

HAPPY HALF BIRTHDAY!  Enjoy your half teddy bear! 










OR YOUR HALF BARBIE!!!

To me, it's just another way to spoil your kid rotten by adding a second "birthday" to their life.
Like an annual birthday isn't enough.  Like your kid is that damn special that an additional celebration of their sloppy painful birth is required.
Probably with gifts and a big ole party cuz your kid is that friggin awesome that he/she requires more stuff and attention.

Where the hell did this trend come from?  What crazy ass, over the top, my kid is so perfect he/she needs TWO parties parent created this?


What the hell people?  Let's just celebrate the shit out of our kids. Why the hell not?

Let's also starting having a "Conception Birthday."  If you know the exact date you got your freak on and conceived  your little prince/princess, have a party. The cake could be a little round circle cake with cream frosting and squiggly little sperm-looking candles all over it. Or these:










Let's also have a "Labor Has Begun Party" to celebrate when those bastard contractions started, or, when your water broke, beginning the process of pushing your "perfect" kid out into the world. That would be a fun party, by the way.  Water balloon fights and sucker punches to the stomach for all kids invited to celebrate the anniversary of the magic labor event!
Look!  It's just like when mommy's water broke the day you were born!
I'm hoping I can be the super proud mom to throw her kid a "First Detention" or "First Suspension from School" party.  You'd all be invited to share in my proud moment of glory in parenting.

Well, it's the weekend y'all.  I'd better go plan a "YAY. YOU MADE IT THROUGH A WHOLE WEEK OF SCHOOL" party for my kid.
Ugh.

2 Comment:

blissflower1969 March 5, 2012 at 9:49 AM  

If they are having both a regular birthday AND a half birthday, I agree. That's stupid.
But in defense of some folks, I know a friend with a December birthday who always had her party in June so they could have an outdoor party (December in Iowa is NOT conducive for outdoor parties). But she didn't have a party in December, so it's not like she doubled up. Likewise, I know a woman who has a half birthday party for her daughter because the girl's birthday is in August. She decided it was too hard to try and have a party when everyone is gone for the summer, so she has it in Feb or March instead. But again, no celebration in August. They just wait and do the whole thing on the halves instead of the actual day.
But if it's just another excuse for presents? Tacky to the max.

elizabeth March 5, 2012 at 6:12 PM  

yea I agree with you! It's hard for kids to wait for presents. How many of us get things for the kids in between birthdays anyway... yea it's kinda like that

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