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12 Days of Christmas, Sarcastic-style

  To the tune of, "Twelve Days of Christmas"


On the 1st day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
A possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze.

On the 2nd day of Christmas, the universe gave to me....
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze.

On the 3rd day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze.

On the 4th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze.

On the 5th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me....
5 glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze.

On the 6th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 7th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 8th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me
8 half-empty rolls of wrapping paper
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 9th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me....
9 replays of Will Ferrells' Elf
8 half-empty rolls of wrapping paper
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 10th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me....
10 lbs gained from fudge and cookies
9 replays of Will Ferrells' Elf
8 half-empty rolls of wrapping paper
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 11th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me....
11 garbage bags full from unwrapping
10 lbs gained from fudge and cookies
9 replays of Will Ferrells' Elf
8 half-empty rolls of wrapping paper
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze

On the 12th day of Christmas, the universe gave to me...
12 awesome blog followers!
11 garbage bags full from unwrapping
10 lbs gained from fudge and cookies
9 replays of Will Ferrells' Elf
8 half-empty rolls of wrapping paper
7 rude shoppers at Target
6 hits on the snooze button
5 "Glasses of wine!
4 Amazon.com packages
3 eyerolls from the Hubby
2 nice new pimples
And a possible case of whooping cough and a sneeze







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