Half-Assed Weekend Post of Randomness. Now With Four Wheel Drive, Charlie Sheen, and Old Ladies.
Haven't done a half-assed weekend post in a while.
So here goes.
"Someone" in my house spent a shitload of money on this yesterday:
My readers are smart, they can figure out who did this.
Therefore "someone" in my house, who's awesome and pretty and smart, will likely be scoring one of the below soon because fair is fair and if you don't want to hear "someone" nag like the professional nag she is, then you will suck it up and like it, or drive yourself off in your little remote control toy.
Saw this in the "news" yesterday:
People? I don't know about you, but if I were a judge in family court, I'd totally base my custody judgment on the testimony of slutty whore porn stars. Just look at them. They look to me like they probably have Ph.Ds in child development and psychology. If you could get that degree from finishing a coloring book and blow jobs were your final exam.
Also, if I play anymore games of Skip Bo on my phone? This will be me:
The dude in the back? I have no clue. But I'm betting he's fun to hang out with. Plus he's patriotic, and who doesn't love themselves a flag wearing man?
Seriously people. I've played almost 600 games on my Skip Bo app. But bonus? I've won 509 of them so I'm basically awesome regardless.
Lastly, to toot my own horn because I wanted to type "toot" plus brag about myself at the same time, I officially have 50 actual followers!! Woo to the hoo! You people rock! And because my self esteem is directly tied to my stats, I'm now averaging about 3000 page views a month. Score. PLUS, I've added comment luv so when you comment on one of my posts, your name will link to your most recent blog post and traffic will increase to your site too when people read your posts and see how creative you are. So comment away. It's good for the both of us. Oh, and I'm on the Twitter now too. I have no idea why or how to use it but hey, I'm a follower. Click on the Twitter widget, aka Twidget, on the top right of the blog page and read all of my tweety twatty twits. Or whatever you call them.
Peace out home fries. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!
So here goes.
"Someone" in my house spent a shitload of money on this yesterday:
Therefore "someone" in my house, who's awesome and pretty and smart, will likely be scoring one of the below soon because fair is fair and if you don't want to hear "someone" nag like the professional nag she is, then you will suck it up and like it, or drive yourself off in your little remote control toy.
 |
| Can't wait to own you, iPad 2 |
Saw this in the "news" yesterday:
People? I don't know about you, but if I were a judge in family court, I'd totally base my custody judgment on the testimony of slutty whore porn stars. Just look at them. They look to me like they probably have Ph.Ds in child development and psychology. If you could get that degree from finishing a coloring book and blow jobs were your final exam.
Also, if I play anymore games of Skip Bo on my phone? This will be me:
The dude in the back? I have no clue. But I'm betting he's fun to hang out with. Plus he's patriotic, and who doesn't love themselves a flag wearing man?
Seriously people. I've played almost 600 games on my Skip Bo app. But bonus? I've won 509 of them so I'm basically awesome regardless.
Lastly, to toot my own horn because I wanted to type "toot" plus brag about myself at the same time, I officially have 50 actual followers!! Woo to the hoo! You people rock! And because my self esteem is directly tied to my stats, I'm now averaging about 3000 page views a month. Score. PLUS, I've added comment luv so when you comment on one of my posts, your name will link to your most recent blog post and traffic will increase to your site too when people read your posts and see how creative you are. So comment away. It's good for the both of us. Oh, and I'm on the Twitter now too. I have no idea why or how to use it but hey, I'm a follower. Click on the Twitter widget, aka Twidget, on the top right of the blog page and read all of my tweety twatty twits. Or whatever you call them.
Peace out home fries. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!
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